My Story

Drifting without direction

For a long time, I drifted through life without any real sense of direction. I wasn’t thinking long term. I wasn’t building anything meaningful. My goals were pretty basic: get a job, earn a wage, get by, have a laugh and try not to think too much beyond that. Looking back, it felt like getting into a boat, untying the ropes and pushing away from the shore, but never actually starting the engine. You’ll still move, you’ll still float, and from the outside it might even look like you’re going somewhere. But in reality, you’re not steering. You’re just being carried.

And that was me for quite a few years...

Loss, grief and rock bottom

Between the ages of 19 and 21, I lost my grandad, two uncles, and then my dad to alcoholism.

My dad was only 50 years old. He was one of the strongest male figures in my life, and losing him left a hole I didn’t know how to deal with. The truth is, I didn’t deal with it well. I spiralled. I ended up sleeping on my mum’s sofa in her one-bedroom flat, stuck in debt, out of work, and using unhelpful coping mechanisms to avoid facing what was really going on. I wasn’t taking responsibility for my future because, at that point, I couldn’t really see one. I remember kneeling at the end of my mum’s bed one day while she was out, crying and praying to a God I didn’t even believe in, just asking for help.

That was the lowest point of my life.

I genuinely couldn’t see a way forward.

The question that changed something

Eventually, I reached out to a local charity that specialised in talking therapies. During one of the sessions, a lady asked me a question I’ll never forget:

“Where would you like to be in five years’ time?”

I didn’t know. I didn’t care. From where I was sitting, it felt irrelevant. But then she asked it differently:

“If nothing was holding you back, and you could have anything you wanted, what would it be?”

That landed differently. For the first time in years, I allowed myself to think about it. I said the things that represented stability to me: a job, being debt free, meeting someone, buying a house. They might sound simple, but to me they represented safety, structure and a different kind of life.

The problem was, I didn’t believe I could achieve any of it from where I was. Still, that conversation planted something. We created a simple action plan, and the first step was just to find a job. It sounds small, but at the time it gave me something I’d been missing for years. Direction!

Rebuilding my life

From there, things slowly started to shift. I reduced the drinking, stopped hiding from reality, found work, and started getting some structure back into my life having something to aim for! Around that time, I met Sarah, who is now my wife, and that relationship became a huge part of the rebuilding process. Her parents helped me clear my debts and allowed me to repay them monthly, which lifted a massive emotional weight from my shoulders and Two years later, we managed to save up enough to buy our first house and started building our life properly. Looking back now, I can see that I eventually achieved the very things I once thought were impossible. Step by step, they eventually became real.

Drifting again, just in a different way

But here’s the part that matters most. The pattern didn’t just disappear! Life became stable. My career progressed. I was earning well, providing, and doing what I thought I was supposed to be doing. But quietly, I started drifting again. Not in a dramatic way. More in that comfortable, easy-to-ignore kind of way.

I had ideas about starting my own business and talked about them for months, probably years. But when it came to actually doing something about it, I hesitated. I was scared of failing. Scared of losing what I had rebuilt. Scared of ending up back in a place I had fought hard to get out of. So when things felt uncomfortable, I distracted myself. If a decision felt heavy, I delayed it. If discipline was required, I chose comfort. Nothing extreme. Nothing dramatic. Just enough to keep me stuck. And that was the frustrating part, because I wasn’t incapable. I had just stopped trusting myself.

When you keep saying you’re going to do something and then don’t, it chips away at you.

That gap between knowing what you should do and actually doing it slowly erodes self-belief.

And once self-trust starts slipping, everything else tends to follow.

The challenge I needed to hear

Things shifted when a colleague of mine, Joanne, challenged me directly. She said: “Jamie, you’ve talked about starting a business for years. When are you actually going to do something about it?” And honestly, she was right. I was all ambition and no execution. That conversation stayed with me, and I’m genuinely grateful to Joanne for saying it. She challenged me in a way I needed at the time, and if she hadn’t, there’s every chance I might not have started this business at all. Sometimes one honest question at the right moment cuts through all the excuses, all the overthinking, and all the waiting around for the perfect time. That was one of those moments for me.

I'm sure you can all relate to one comment or question someone has asked you in your life which sparked a huge change within!

Where coaching came in to it

Around the same period, I had trained and been coaching inexperienced managers in my corporate job, helping them work through limiting beliefs, confidence issues, time management, behaviour patterns and the challenges that come with stepping up and leading others. I could see how powerful honest reflection, structured thinking and better habits could be when someone was ready to move forward.

Then one day, while listening to a podcast, I discovered The Coaching Masters, coach training for aspiring coaches. That was the lightbulb moment. The business i desired to start and build, and from that, Grow Smart Coaching Ltd was born. I committed to not just to start a business, but to build a life with more intention and help other people stop drifting in the way I had been. Something to focus on, a challenge, Something to provide me with direction again.

We are limited by the time we have on this earth and nobody should arrive at the end of their life with regrets wondering if only they had tried...

Why I started my coaching business...

I've since been coaching for the past 5 years and now I help aspiring entrepreneurs who have a real desire to start a business, but keep finding themselves stuck.

You might have ideas, ambition and a genuine feeling that you want to build something of your own, but when it comes to actually moving forward, you overthink, put things off, doubt yourself, and slip back into habits that don’t serve you.

You might not know where to start, what technology to use, how to structure your idea, or how to deal with the challenges that could come up along the way.

That’s where my experience really helps...

Alongside coaching, I’ve spent years working on projects involving business analysis, customer experience, technology, process improvement and strategic planning. I’m used to taking big, messy ideas and breaking them down into smaller, manageable steps, working in agile ways, testing, learning, adapting and moving forward.

Because starting a business doesn’t need to mean having every answer before you begin. You need enough clarity to take the next step, enough structure to keep moving, and enough self-trust to learn as you go.

That’s why I do this work!

Because I know what it feels like to have the ambition but lack the direction, structure and confidence to act on it. And I also know what can happen when you stop drifting, build a plan, take imperfect action and finally start moving forward 🚀

“You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.” - Zig Ziglar

Ready to stop drifting?

If part of this story feels familiar, maybe it’s time to stop waiting for the perfect moment and start creating some direction.

Book a free discovery call and let’s explore where you are, what’s been holding you back, and whether coaching could help you move forward and make your business a reality.

👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼

NAVIGATION

Contact Us

[email protected]

Jamie Neil Vaughan Coaching is a trading name of Grow Smart Coaching Ltd.
Grow Smart Coaching Ltd is registered in England and Wales. Company number: 15730564 Registered office: 22 Shelley Road, Worthing, West Sussex, BN11 1TU

Privacy Policy | Terms of Uset